The sunlight shone in my eyes and for three seconds I was blinded. Blinded perhaps, by the idea of you. Three circles on my finger, in different colours, the aqua blue one is for her. She tells me that i am her family now. She is sweet, with fire in her hair and sunlight in her smile. It's like poison ivy, pretty but harmful, the idea of it is attractive but the moment you touch it, this is the very point that there seems to be no return. I type as if i play the piano, making lyrics of notes and words that symbolize beautifully crafted chords. Candle light guides me as I listen to the gramophone behind me. This thing grows up the side of my face and slowly descends down my throat, into my deep lungs and the branches twist around every bronchial tube, filled with your breath, you squeeze every last drop of air from my body and I am cautious of du, yourself and him. I record everything in my photographic mind, for i do not recall literature or numerical digits. They fall backwards and turn themselves inside out. I will not let you do that to me. I shall stand straight, stand stiff and rigid, like a corpse as you kiss my left ear and tickle my thoughts. The words fall from my diamond shaped brain, what is this and who the fuck are you. They stand around the fire, and as it slowly begins to go out, he pours gasoline on it. Again it ignites. The process is repeated over and over, it quickly turns into a ritual, a war of tug, a tug of war. Tumbling down my right leg and affixing itself to my meridians, it pushes deep into my veins and I am engulfed by your smell. I am smothered with the belief that this is it. I can hear here vomiting in the backround, from somewhere over to the left. I dreamt that you were holding her. You thought that i didn't know, but you were wrong. deeply wrong. I hold you and there is a blockage. He must sit still in the colour green. be submerged in green. there is too much fog. Byde yunder fir a peerie while will du. Du is so fein. He passes me holding a rubix cube. It is all different colours and he hides it under his woolen hat. I wonder if you will show me what is under that hat one day. the two men sit still and talk about meditation.i used to venture into those plains of unconsciousness but now i inhale my own words and they turn into inages of the future. i know as i attracted that. you asked for me. how do you know that she's cheating on you he asked. every one has a weak point he tells me. when i am alone, I am here in this place, when i am near you, i am in another place and in those moments, I am happy from my insides.